Wow, a lot has certainly happened during 2017. Along with my previous posts about the deaths of 2 amazing women, I also had a cancer scare in October/November.
Early October I received my pap smear results which was something i had put having done for a while. I was told i had CIN3 which is high-grade pre cancerous cells in my cervix and I would need to see a gynecologist.
The lead up to the consultation was absolutely terrifying, but once there I realised there really wasn’t anything to worry about. It was basically an extended pap test, however he did take 2 biopsies while there which gave me bad cramping afterwards. The dr also told me I would need to have a cone biopsy done under general anesthetic to remove the bad cells and to ensure they haven’t gone further up into my cervix.
As you know by now, stress is a major trigger for my CVS, so this was affecting me in more ways than one.
The weeks leading up to my operation, only 2 weeks after my consultation I was having difficulties sleeping and panic attacks just thinking about the reason why I’m having the operation and what else they could find while there. Thankfully the operation all went smoothly, the cut out a small section of my cervix to get all of the bad cells, results came back saying there was nothing further up. I don’t have cervical cancer! The psychological side of the whole thing was much worse than the physical, I woke up a little sore afterwards, and I couldn’t lift anything over 4 kgs for the following 4 weeks, but I was fine. I’ll be heading back in march to have another test done to ensure it hasn’t come back, and will continue having regular check ups until I’m given the all clear. One good thing that has come of this I’d that I have quit smoking! It’s been 2 months since my last cigarette.
I had the operation on the 15th of November, with November being a horrible month for my CVS as it is, I was trying my best to keep my nerves at bay.. November 2017 was the first time that I haven’t documented a 5+ day attack in the past 3 years, Which I see as quite an accomplishment and it shows me that my medication is helping to control my symptoms.
In the year 2017 I documented roughly 93 CVS days, Unfortunately one of them was on Christmas day, However it was one of my “good” attacks, where it only lasts anywhere between 5 minutes to one hour. I wish all of my CVS attacks were so short.. but with these new meds, slowly learning triggers and how to read my body during an attack, I’m hoping my CVS days will be less this year.
only 2 days into 2018 and we have already lost a CVS warrior due to CVS related issues, His mother posted on our support group to remind us all to listen to our bodies and to not leave it too late to go to the hospital for treatment, as she strongly believes this is why we lost Ryan the way we did. Dehydration and renal failure are very serious issues for us. In my previous posts you would have read how poorly we can be treated in the ER, This is why so many of us put off going to the hospital until we absolutely have no other option, as we are scared of the treatment we may receive, judgmental looks, the waiting in public rooms with people who don’t understand the condition, wondering why you’re making such noises. you can generally tell what they’re thinking.. some people out there can be very cruel when they aren’t aware of the full picture.
I’ve also come to notice that the majority of CVS sufferers we lose to related issues are generally between the ages of 30 and 45 years old. Sure there are many cvs warriors who are beyond this age bracket, the oldest we know being 65 years of age, however it’s something that plays in the back of my mind, especially when my 25th birthday is not far away.
Sometimes you feel like a burden.. you feel like a disappointment. These days I need to remember to remind myself that I am not alone in this, and I’m doing the best I can.
I’m hoping 2018 will be a much better year than the last, I’m hoping for good health for all my family, friends and CVS warriors. I have a few ideas up my sleeve in terms of raising awareness for CVS in my area, So hopefully that will come to fruition aswell.
We will just have to wait to see what the year will bring.
A Chronic Mind; 